As much as we'd hate to admit it, family, in some way, influences the decisions we make. No matter how old we get.
As children, we look to our parents and other family members to guide us on the road to adulthood. How we dress, how we speak, what we think. Our beliefs are shaped by the experiences of those wise in their years. Why? Because as blank sheets, we have to learn how the world works.
Then we hit the dreaded teenage years. Our desire to become individuals, independent of those who taught us, and stand out from our peers emerges. What we now think, feel, and believe does not always coincide what we were taught. Our style of dress, word choices...our minds are now our own. Our personal experiences begin to break the mold of what we were taught.
But what about our beliefs? By beliefs, I'm not refering to religious ones, because everyones personal beliefs are their own. The beliefs I'm refering to are what determines who we fall in love with.
No matter where you go in the world, race - in some places more than others - is an issue. Who you decide to become friends with and whom you fall in love with is influenced by those closest to you. If the one your heart guided you to is not of the same race, the relationship may be frowned upon. Family, friends, and society as a whole often feel they have the right to give you their opinions.
But what about your opinions? At what point do you put your foot down and go with your heart?
Nearly everywhere you look, families of mixed races can be found. The reactions to interracial relationships depends on where you live. The youth of today have learned to embrace the racial and cultural differences between them and their school mates. They look at the quality of a person and ignore skin color. I applaud this. What remains of prejudice comes from older people who are set in their ways, or from young ones who are still living under the raciest influence of those around them. When it comes to finding love, your heart should be your guide. Not family, not friends, not the people in the town you live in.
Family influence is a subject that is brought up in
A Heart Not Easily Broken. Ebony Campbell comes from a black family in North Carolina. Her family has taught her to be open minded, to never judge anyone because of the color of their skin, and to make her own decisions. Ebony's parents are in their late 50's and grew up when racial relations were tense. Their experiences taught them that races don't mix when it comes to family. The constantly try to introduce her to every available black bachelor, which causes Ebony to be warry about getting involved with a man of any other race than her own.
Brian Young sees things differently. Growning up in southern California, he comes from a very liberal family. He has been taught to see a person for who and what they are, no matter what race. When Brian meets Ebony, he is interested in who she is as a woman, the color of her skin only intrigues him. Brian has to work to break down the barrier Ebony sets up and convience her he has more to offer than just friendship. When their relationship progresses to more, Ebony must chose. Does she allow how her family will feel about her dating a white man cause her to loose the happiness she has found?
Here's this week's question: Does your families' opinions continue to affect the major decisions in your life? Where do you draw the line?
I
preferred a man who was tall, had thick lips, and eyes that could peer into the
depths of my soul. A man with the body of a sex machine, yet had no problem
working hard for a living and wasn’t afraid to get his hands dirty. One of the
first things I noticed about a man was not his shoe size, but his hands. If
they were too pretty and soft, the man didn’t believe in hard work. If they
were overly calloused with visible dirt under the nails and full of scrapes and
bruises, those were signs that a man didn’t take care of the little things,
which meant the rest of him would be questionable. Now, a man with hands somewhere
in between, calloused from work with no traces of dirt under his nails, those
were signs of a hardworking man who could clean up nice…everywhere. 
